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Parenthetical Peanutbutter
(Marked by or given to digression; discursive, rambling, tangential.)
kalquessa
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All my fics and parody scripts collected handily in one place! Everything here is 100% Gen, fics are listed more or less in chronological order according to series timeline. Characters and settings are the property of their respective creators and owners. Fanfic wouldn't be nearly so much fun if I got paid to write it.

Stargate: SG-1 )
Supernatural )
Narnia )

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kalquessa
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Bad News: I am still sick. *blows nose*

Good News: I just managed to give the kid a bath without him pooping in the water even once. *victory pump*

Yes, my life really is this exciting. You're jealous, aren't you? Don't lie, I know you are.

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kalquessa
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You guys, I think I'm catching a cold! Graah! No fever or any of that, so I don't think I need to worry that I'm succumbing to either swine flu or the original flavor flu, but I woke up with a sore throat this morning, which is usually how the garden variety cold virus kicks off with me.

I do not need to be sick right now, yo! More urgently, I do not need to get my kid sick. Pray for my white blood cells and cross your fingers for Bear's immune system, huh?

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kalquessa
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It has to have been a couple of weeks since I posted a picspam of cute, yes? I believe that you require confirmation that my kid is still really cute!

Behold my lord and master )

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kalquessa
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So it turns out that when you have to sit and hook yourself up to a breast pump and be milked like a cow several times a day, you end up watching a lot of TV on the internet. I have thoughts.

The Big Bang Theory )

Castle )

Glee )

Bones )

Fringe )

Supernatural )

Psych )

Stargate Universe )

White Collar )

Numb3rs )

I'm also re-watching Stargate with [info]redial_the_gate, as always, but I hardly need to tell you how I feel about that show, do I? *grin*

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kalquessa
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1. OMG I miss you guys! Have been slowly trying to ease back into fandom a bit via SPN episode reactions (on which I am behind) and [info]redial_the_gate, but I miss the copious amounts of friendslist-reading time afforded by my previous life as a Snarky Receptionist of Doom. *sniff*

2. On the upside, the geekspawn is nursing a lot better, and feeding him usually involves a lot less sturm und drang these days. I'm thus a lot more comfortable nursing in semi-public (by which I mean places where only other women can see me, I'm going to need a few more degrees of confidence and a proper nursing cover before I'm okay just sitting down in any corner and going for it). So while my internet social life languishes, I at least have regained some fragment of my real-life one and can attend church without totally stressing out every week.

3. Speaking of nursing, a question about breastmilk for people who know stuff: various books and other sources quote wildly differing numbers when it comes to how long the boobie juice can be stored in the fridge. I've seen everything from 48 hours to eight days. What is the story on that, and is there some authoritative figure that anyone can direct me to?

4. Re-reading Gone With the Wind. Damn, this book is a masterpiece.

5. This just in: my kid is really cute.

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kalquessa
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IMG_0393
Originally uploaded by eatthepeppers
I come bearing something even better than candy: baby smiles!
kalquessa
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Well, first-time vaccinations are officially my least favorite thing this week (and it has not been an easy week, either). His Fourthness, now seven weeks old, visited the doctor today and came home with two stabbed-up thighs, which apparently got very sore while he slept because when he woke up the crying was apocalyptic. My normally sweet baby who almost never cries for any longer than it takes to get me to feed him screamed uncontrollably and with great pathos for what seemed like forever. I guess if you're brand new and have never known pain, sore thighs are a big deal. Thank goodness for Baby Motrin is all I'm saying.

(I totally wept when they gave him his shots and he let loose with the "WHY are you HURTING me??" wail, which I'd never heard before. And I cried again when he woke up at home and started shrieking. The mother-in-law had to come help me dose him with Motrin, I was so beside myself. That's more crying in one day than I normally do in six months to a year. I've never been so distraught over someone else's pain. Being a mommy is weird.)

In happier news, according to the doctor's scale, he's nine pounds and nine ounces today. Gone is the gangly little baby of yore, here is the hungry hungry hippo baby with three chins. So all the sore mammaries and epic nursing sessions that make me feel like I'm in Purgatory are not going to waste! \o/

Aaand the angry baby with the hurting legs is finally sound asleep, so I think I will go take a nap before he wakes up and discovers that the Motrin is wearing off. *crashes*

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kalquessa
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(I need a baby icon. Those of the icon-making persuasion could interpret this as an invitation.)

Okay, the last couple of days were rough, but today is better so far, and I feel like posting pictures to remind me and everyone else why this is all so very worth the exhaustion and insanity.

Peeeectures! )

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kalquessa
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I know I should be happy every time my kid experiences a growth spurt, and I really am trying to appreciate how easily he's growing, since I know of babies out there right now who are fighting for every ounce they put on...but mostly, I just dread the marathon feeding sessions and having him demand food every hour and a half. I have an absurd and irrational desire to yell at him to stop growing so fast.

Hopefully I can be forgiven for my lack of perspective, since I am sleep-deprived on a truly epic scale. And thankfully the spawn is really cute and soft and looks a lot like my husband, whom I love, so I haven't actually yelled at him or done anything else but bend to his wishes. I'm just. So. TIRED.

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The father-in-law and I have decided that in light of the CW website's epic fail last week, we're just going to pool our resources and buy the season on iTunes. It's fun pretending to be grown-ups with money.

I have heard rumors that this ep received something of a lukewarm reaction from some quarters of fandom. Fair warning, then: it filled me with giggles and flaily joy. )

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Dear Zaphod Beeblebrox:

Where did you get your third arm, and do you know if they have more for sale?

Love,

Marie

-----

Dear Baby:

Did you know that there is an absolutely staggering number of things that I need or want to do but which are frankly impossible to accomplish while holding you because you refuse to be put down? Not that you care, or anything, I just thought I'd share.

Love,

Mommy
kalquessa
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The father-in-law finally cracked and bought this off iTunes since the CW still hadn't uploaded it to their streaming website as of Monday afternoon. *shakes fist* Why does the one show I really care about staying current with have to be on the one major network that can't seem to get their episode streaming figured out? They finally started using a player that actually worked this season, but that doesn't do me much good if they never give me an episode to watch with it! *is cranky*

Anyway.

Strap on your angel wings... )

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I keep meaning to write this, and then just running out of enthusiasm once I sit down to it. Rarr.

Stuff I can still remember thinking almost a week ago... )

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Today is Bear's due date. *grin* Granted, he's been outside the womb for over three weeks, but I felt the date warranted pictures. Because everything warrants baby pictures! I meant to post this earlier, but a nap and getting at least halfway through my Redial summary for next week took priority. Oh well, it's still 9/24 here for four more hours.

Happy due date, little man! )

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kalquessa
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I think I need a Castiel icon.

Set me up with the Spirit in the sky... )

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Bear and I have discovered our official song as a couple:

"You Ruined Everything" by Jonathan Coulton

Lyrics and a gratuitous baby pic from this morning under the cut!

You ruined everything in the nicest way... )

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kalquessa
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[info]sarcasticval was born today! *confetti* Val leaves the best voicemail messages in the history of voicemails, and in case that isn't proof enough of her fabulousness, she's also the only person to ever get the obscure TV show reference on my car's license plate frame.

I'd love to write more about how awesome it is to have Val as a friend, but I am typing this with one hand while the other rocks a baby. Many happy returns, my darling! I hope today is excellent on all levels and involves good company and delicious edibles!

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New episode tomorrow, so I wanted to get my brief thoughts posted before everyone's completely forgotten last week's ep. Obviously, I don't have a lot of time or brain power to spare these days, but these are the reactions I can still remember having last Friday:

Snip! )

Yay, Season 5! I'm actually very optimistic about where this season is going to go, more so than I was at the end of last season. I have to be, because my doctor says I'm supposed to take tender, loving care of my blood pressure for the next month. Maybe I should let Kripke know about that so he can match episodes to air dates accordingly.

And now, off to snuggle a baby!

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Today was Bear's two-week check-up with his pediatrician, who proclaimed herself very pleased with his weight gain (he had gained back his birth weight after only a week of life last Tuesday, and he's gained an ounce a day since then) and everything else about him. We can has healthy growing baby! In celebration of which, I come bearing a picspam! But first, some whining about breastfeeding, because I feel the need to complain. At length. (Seriously, go ahead and skip to the pictures. I'm not kidding about the "at length" part. At all.)

In which I actually manage not to use the word 'boob' even once... )

Okay, I feel better. Really, other than the tedium and frustration of breastfeeding, I'm doing remarkably well. I'm tired, of course, but I'm nowhere near as drained and exhausted as I was all during pregnancy. I finally have an honest-to-God appetite, I have my body mostly to myself again, and I'm not sick anymore!! *dances* As much trouble as he occasionally is, I like Bear much better now that he's outside the womb than I did when he was making me wretchedly ill and miserable for eight months. Plus, he's really cute, and that makes up for a lot. Speaking of which: on to the pictures!!

Warning: EPIC CUTENESS under the cut! )

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User: [info]kalquessa
Name: The Cheese Elf
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Snark, big words, huge parenthetical statements and downright silliness in the face of adversity!

"It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. This is true. It's called Life." --Terry Pratchett

"Sarcasm: the last refuge of modest and chaste-souled people when the privacy of their soul is coarsely and intrusively invaded."
--Fyodor Dostoevsky

"Silly things do cease to be silly when they are done by sensible people in an impudent way."
--Jane Austen

Forgive me, distant wars, for bringing flowers home. Forgive me, open wounds, for pricking my finger. I apologize for my record of minutes to those who cry from the depths. I apologize to those who wait in railway stations for being asleep today at five a.m. Pardon me, hounded hope, for laughing from time to time.
--Wislawa Szymborska
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