The Cheese Elf (kalquessa) wrote,
The Cheese Elf

Floating Tower of Fanfic

All my fics and parody scripts collected handily in one place! Everything here is 100% Gen, fics are listed more or less in chronological order according to series timeline. Characters and settings are the property of their respective creators and owners. Fanfic wouldn't be nearly so much fun if I got paid to write it.

Stargate: SG-1 Fanfic
Supernatural Fanfic

Narnia Fanfic



The Gray: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 - Sam, Team - 15,000+ words - G
The team makes some disturbing discoveries when they try to uncover the source of a planet's "magic." I am inordinately proud of this monster. Drama/mystery/angst.
Season 1.

Cordiform - Teal'c, Sam - 647 words - G
Sam, Teal'c, Valentines, arts and crafts. Schmoop, shmoop, schmoopity schmoop.
Season 2.

Everybody Secretly Wishes They Were a Rock Star - Team - 688 words - G
Silly, silly birthday ficlet containing flagrantly non-canon use of the quantum mirror. Did I mention it was silly? Humor.
Season 3.

H is for Hand-to-hand - Sam - 713 words - PG (violence)
Sam Carter kicks ass. That's actually the fic summary, as well as a general statement of approval. Written for Defining Sam Carter from A to Z. Action.
Season 5.

Linguistic Dendrology - Jack, Daniel - 600 words - G
Silly birthday ficlet with tree-aliens. Banter for the sake of banter. Quite possibly crack. Humor.
Season 7.

Clip Show - Sam - 2993 words - G
Just what it says on the tin. Somewhat maudlin flashback fic. Weird aliens, assorted memories good and bad, blue Jell-O. Angst.
Season 7.

Sufficient Illumination - Jack, Teal'c - 1,242 words - G
"Seriousness is not a virtue." --G.K. Chesterton. Humor, character study.
Season 7.

C is for Clothes, Which Make the Man - Daniel, Sam - 178 words - G
Sam and Daniel briefly discuss his pre-Ascension wardrobe. Written for sg_fignewton's Daniel Alphabet Soup. Humor.
Season 7.

Overheard in the ICU - Daniel, Janet, House - 1,608 words - PG-13 (innuendo)
Crossover with House M.D. This is what happens when you ask me "Who would win in a fight, Gregory House or Janet Frasier?": I send Daniel to New Jersey and give him an alien plague. Humor.
Season 7.

B is for Boys - Sam - 290 words - G
A "New Order" tag wherein Sam contemplates her boys. Written for Defining Sam Carter from A to Z. Schmoopy sentimentality.
Season 8.

Girls (and Jaffa) Do Not Fight Fair - Team - 1,200 words - G
The team recounts a few misadventures for Jack. Chain mail and gladiatorial combat are involved. Humor.
Season 8.

Retail Price - S9 Team - 851 words - G
In which Sam and Teal'c are compelled to pay retail price for one archaeologist and one lieutenant colonel. Humor.
Season 9.

Rain on Your Wedding Day - Teal'c, Cam, Vala - 526 words - G
Teal'c, Cameron, and Vala discuss the definition of irony. Humor.
Season 10.

Aggravated Destruction of Property - Vala, Jonas - 2,350 words - G
The idea was to have Jonas rescued by Vala in as entertaining a manner as possible. I'm fairly satisfied that I succeeded. Humor, some angst, character fic.
Season 10.

Time Share (O is for Old Age) - Jack, mini!Jack - 948 words - G
Two Jacks, two beers, two favors. No fish. Character study, some humor, some angst.
Season 10.

Untitled banter ficlet - Jack, Daniel - 1,003 words - G
Included for the sake of completion: baby's first attempt at Stargate fic!

Parody Scripts

"The Broca Divide"

"The First Commandment"

"Thor's Hammer"


"Crystal Skull"




Cradle Song for a Hunter's Child - 117 words - G
Fan poetry. What happens when I spend two days researching the amulets and talismans of a dozen cultures, and then start wondering what kind of lullaby a hunter's wife would sing to her baby back in the Samuel Colt era.

Fare Le Corna - Dean, Sam - 1,133 words - G
Birthday ficlet, involves Shakespeare, a ghost light, my favorite Black Sabbath song, and use of the term "cuckold." Good times. Fluffy humor.
Season 1.

Positive Reinforcement - Dean - 1,300 words - G
In which Dean Winchester runs afoul of the county fuzz. Or not. Humor.
Season 1.

Untitled QC Crossover - Dean, Sam, Faye, Dora, Raven - 1,720 words - PG-13
A brief, crack-filled crossover in which the Winchesters wander into the world of Questionable Content. Shouldn't require much or any familiarity with the webcomic to be intelligible. Crack crack crackity-crack. Humor.
Season 1.

Barefoot Girl: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 - Dean, Alba - 11,547 - PG
Crossover with The Time Traveler's Wife. Ten times Dean runs into Alba DeTamble, cuteness and angst and possibly some vague cosmology. Familiarity with TTW not required.
Pre-series to Season 2.

a little bit of fly right down - Dean, Sam - 3,364 words - G
Linked ficlets on a theme. Mostly an examination of the Winchester boys at various points as an excuse for self-indulgent lyricism. Angst, character study, some humor.
Pre-series to Season 3-ish

And Sings the Tune Without the Words - Dean, Alba - 582 words - G
A continuation of Barefoot Girl. Episode tag for "On the Head of a Pin," which I decided needs some Alba. Angst.
Season 4

Capacity - Sam and Dean - 1780 words - G
Sam contemplates Dean's ability to make things fit.
Pre-series to Season 4

Rust - the Impala - 703 words - G
Impalapocafic. "After the world ends, things quiet down a lot."
Futurefic, rendered wildly AU by various eps of S5.

Parody Scripts

Generic Supernatural Episode: Season 1 Edition

Generic Supernatural Episode: Season 2 Edition


By Sun and Candlelight - Susan - 2,823 words - G
My own take on Susan's life after The Last Battle and her eventual return to Narnia. Angst.

Tags: administrativa, my fanfic, parody scripts, stargate, supernatural
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